Monday, March 29, 2010

Health Care Bill Protects Texas' Abstinence-Industrial Complex

this photo is unrelated. just hot.

Texas is home to many enduring mysteries: Tex Mex, straight men in cowboy boots, and abstinence-only programs. While our Attorney General Greg Abbott is busy suing the federal government to prevent the healthcare reform bill from taking effect I hope he realizes that, as reported in the Washington Post this weekend,
A little-noticed provision of the health legislation has rescued federal support for a controversial form of sex education: teaching youths to remain virgins until marriage.
Sigh. Texas receives more funding from the federal government for abstinence programs than any other state and has the dismal teen pregnancy and STI incidence data to show for it. Looks like we can expect continued success* from crazy Abbies like Austin Life Care, Worth the Wait, and the Medical Institute.

*and by "success" I mean "failure."

Friday, March 26, 2010

San Marcos Volleyball Coach Had Sex with, Got Dumped by Female Student

via the Statesman:
William Shawn Harris, 34, has been charged with six counts of having an improper relationship between an educator and student, a second-degree felony. The affidavit states that Harris and the student had intercourse six times, including four times at San Marcos High.
The arrest affidavit for an assistant volleyball coach at San Marcos High School details a sexual relationship between him and an 18-year-old female student that was consummated on school grounds, including in classrooms and bathrooms.
Sounds hot! Memo to the Statesman: you only "consummate" a sexual relationship once.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Texas Fails to Measure Up:
35th in Penis Size in US

Add this to the litany* of depressing Texas rankings to blame on Rick Perry's unchecked rule of the Lone Star State: According to data culled from the "largest database of penis sizes on the planet" claims that Texas men rank 35th in penis size nationally. Another reason to avoid the City of Hate: Dallas comes in dead last among the 20 cities on the list.

How lucky for Julie Sunday to have lived in three of the top 10 cities--New York, Washington, and Atlanta.

Cities Ordered by Penis Size
New Orleans
Washington DC
San Diego
New York City
San Francisco
St. Louis
Los Angeles
Dallas/Ft. Worth

Perhaps this is another reason Texas should exercise its constitutional right to secede from the union so we can be number one...all by ourselves.

*% uninsured [#2], % getting prenatal care in the 1st trimester [#50!] and on and on.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Amarillo Mayor on Talk Radio 3/24

Via Amarillo Citizens Against Repent Amarillo,
I have just been told that Amarillo Mayor Debra McCartt will be taking calls tomorrow morning (3-24-10) at 7:30 am on KGNC talk radio, the station can be found at AM 710. This would be a great time for Amarillo citizens to ask their mayor questions about this issue. So if you have time please give her a call.
The phone number at the station is (806) 320-0710.

The Route 66 was not Repent Amarillo's first success--they also managed last fall to get Amarillo's oldest strip club, the Crystal Pistol (how much more Texan can you get?), shut down through a minor zoning loophole that ended the club's grandfathered status.

Pastor David, the chubby, douchebag patriarch of Raven and Repent Amarillo, had this to say:
The Crystal Pistol Club is still open for the time being (they have a window or time frame to respond) but their days are numbered. If our ministry had not been watching these clubs so closely, the opportunity to capitalize on their poor decision would have passed by without notice.
The Crystal Pistol Club has been in business longer than all the other six clubs and as such is the flagship of all Amarillo’s strip clubs. It will be shut down because God has worked a victory through a small group of Christians who have been obedient enough to step out of church long enough to go out into our city to actually confront the Devil in his back yard.
If God can work this victory through such a small ministry as RAVEN, what would God work through the thousands of Christians in Amarillo who SHOULD be getting out of their air conditioned pews to fulfill the calling of Jesus Christ?
So now that they've gotten the strippers and the swingers, who's next? Pastor David blogged this just last week:
The adultery lifestyle is just the next wolf to emerge out of the dark recesses of our humanistic culture. Homosexuality is already out and currently seeking legitimacy by political bullying and marriage by judicial fiat. The adultery lifestyle is waiting in the twilight and is trying to sneak into the light of public acceptance. Pedophiles are waiting their turn to emerge out of the darkness of public disgust and illegality.
I don't think there has ever been a more compelling argument against public sex offender registries which will make anyone in Amarillo unlucky enough to be registered an easy target for Repent Amarillo and their bullies. But who does he blame for America's 'humanistic' culture? Swingers? Gays? Trannies? No:
Who’s [sic] fault, praytell, is it for this mess? None other than the American Christian church. Over the last several decades the American church has retreated into it’s “sanctuaries” and tried to pretend it can change the world by hiding the light of the Gospel of Christ under a basket, ie. a building. Pastors and elders have been preoccupied with building the next “Six Flags Over Jesus” megachurch rather than attempting to affect social change with the Gospel.
I can't help but agree with his last point there--there are enough Jesus-themed amusement parks already and surely God doesn't care if the roller coaster you're riding is called the Loch Ness Monster or the Jesus Train to Heaven. But I think Jesus does care about "evangelists" harassing and threatening people.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Randy Neugebauer, BABY KILLER!

Sadly, I was wrong about the "baby killer!" culprit. It was Randy Neugebauer from Lubbock (a crazy person from Lubbock? Weird!).

Texans Embarass Themselves In Congress (Again)

via Gawker. If you listen real close in this video, you can hear someone yell "baby killer!!!" over the din in the House chamber.

According to one (falsely) accused legislator who claims the fevered shouting didn't come from his section:
That is where the Texans sit. Californians are in one row, Teaxans sit behind us. I am being told t's a Texan. The people who know won't give it up. (Sic)
So who could it be? According to the National Right to Life Committee's CapWiz scorecard, 20 Texas representatives have perfect scores on "Life" legislation.

Joe Barton, who himself has a 100% score, told the Washington Post that
he heard the remark and said it did come from in the area of where the Texas and California delegations sit. He said he believes he knows who yelled it, but declined to say anymore.

"I can make a guess," Barton said.

Hmm. It could be Kenny Marchant, from Dallas, who cosponsored both the Sanctity of Human Life and Right to Life Acts. Louie Gohmert, who also has a 100% rating, claims: “I have no idea who yelled it because they were seated behind me and the House was packed,” he said. “Whoever said it was obviously upset, but it was inappropriate for them to yell that.”

My money is on John Culberson who engaged in some theatrical bill-throwing antics during the health care debate:


And he posted a video yesterday in which he responds to Barney Frank's complaining about the bigoted nature of some of the anti-health care protests by saying "I haven't picked it up if they have. Anybody that's said anything that's bigoted or based on hatred, that's not acceptable." When Frank duh's him by saying, "The TV cameras have shown it on the TV news," Culberson says, "Well, I haven't picked it up if they have." Riiiight. Meet me at the state line, indeed.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

In Austin for SXSW?
Dildos Are Legal In Texas Now

Forbidden Fruit is right in the thick of SXSW at 512 Neches.

Perhaps you're here in Austin for SXSW or just a southby hanger-on--regardless, you're probably trying to score. Whenever I travel to a new city I always look up the local woman-owned sex toy store and make a point of checking it out. Fortunately for SXSW visitors, Austin's only woman-owned sex toy store has an outpost in the middle of downtown, making it a super convenient stop for those in town listening to music and find themselves in need of a dildo, handcuffs, condoms, lube, what have you.

Forbidden Fruit is owned by Lynn Raridon, who besides being an amazing lady-about-town has defiantly owned the store for more than 20 years. She's been around during the ridiculous days of the sex toy ban, when dildos had to be sold as "educational models" or "condom demonstrators" and vibrators described as "personal massagers." Butt plugs, however, were always butt plugs.

For a little bit of background on the Texas sex toy ban (which was overturned by the 5th Circuit Court in February, 2008) check out the video above, a clip from the hilarious documentary "The Dildo Diaries."

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Nothing Says 'I Like You' Like a Handjob

If you haven't seen the original Handjob infomerical, stop what you're doing and watch it right now. I don't know how this Valentine's Day Handjob commercial got past me in February but I have to say--at two for the low price of $4.95, I need a handjob now more than ever. I could even send one to NINA HARTLEY.

If you want actual information about giving better handjobs, you can read this post and this post from 2008.

As I was saying to NINA HARTLEY...

Way opened yesterday for Goose and I to meet Nina Hartley at a SXSWi event She has a new project called SexWise and was at SXSWi to introduce and promote it. Goose and I were invited to a sex blogger meet and greet with Nina and there wound up being Goose, myself, Sexie Sadie, Cunning Minx (!) and Lisa Vandever, founder of CineKink.

Suffice it to say that being in a tiny room with such a small group of amazing sex writers and activists was real serendipity. Nina is absolutely gorgeous and so bubbly and fun. With SexWise, she's hoping to provide her fans with a place to learn about and discuss sex and sexuality and network with other people who are also interested. We'll give you more details as they come out.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Q: Am I too Short for Doggy Style?
A: Stand on Your Texas Textbooks!

Why not put your Glencoe Health book under that pillow? (Cosmo)

Dear Julie,

I love getting fucked from behind, it's my all time fav position. Problem is, I'm 5 feet tall and my current partner is pushing 6 feet. So unless there's something (a bench or bed at perfect height for example) for me to "prop" myself up on, we find it hard to make it happen. We love switching up location as much as possible so we don't always have the right equipment. Any advice???


Dear Kitty,

As a fellow lady of diminutive stature, I can totally relate to your height disparity problem. But in Texas we're fortunate that the State Board of Education last week approved another mountainous set of textbook requirements, meaning that young'uns all over the state will soon be in possession of yet another 1000 page behemoth, useless textbook to make sex with a partner of great height that much easier.

If you'd prefer not to use textbooks (or, say, aren't in high school), there is a manufacturer making products designed for precisely this type of dilemma: Liberator. The Ramp is designed for just your purpose--and it can be used for other positions to boot. Check out the extensive videos on the website if you need some inspiration (NSFW, but hot). At $145 it's pricey for a pillow, but a good investment for a petite lady who likes it from behind.

If you don't have that much cash to blow on a piece of sex furniture, you may just need to get creative in your locations: find shelves, chairs, high heels, phone books, end tables, desks, counters, and more to get your legs to be as long as your boyfriend's.

Additionally, there are other ways to have sex from behind besides standing up; you can put your head on the floor, on the bed, on a stack of useless Texas-approved textbooks, on the desk, the stairs, whatever happens to be available. Give it a shot. And this one, too. And in case you like a little dose of Disney in your lovin:

The new Social Studies book should come in handy for this one. The "Magic Mountain" (Cosmo)

You can get the sensation of sex from behind at a variety of angles--remember also that you can sit on top of your man, facing his feet, and whatever he's hitting inside you from behind will get stimulated that way as well.

In case none of these tricks work, here's Cosmo's best advice for attracting hot dudes "like crazy"--maybe you can find someone closer to your own height.

Good luck!


Saturday, March 13, 2010

Best Day Ever:
Dan Savage Read My Blog!

Dan read and posted on my piece on Repent Amarillo. Hallelujah!

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Texas Department of Public Safety:
Go Wild, Girls, But Don't Go to Mexico

the TDPS issued a warning on its website about spring break

Woooo! Spring Break! If you're planning to head to South Padre Island for Spring Break this year, don't go across the border to buy liquor if you're underaged, because you might die in the drug-cartel related violence happening in Mexican border towns.

Also, the TDPS has issued some very helpful tips on how to stay safe.
DPS is offering several tips for a safe Spring Break. Don’t text while driving. Wear your seat belt. Don’t drink and drive. Find a sober friend to do the driving. Don’t leave your drink unattended, and don’t accept drinks from strangers. Keep a fresh driver behind the wheel, or stop every couple of hours to rest and walk around. Make sure your vehicle is properly maintained. Keep your friends close.
Thanks guys. Also, bring condoms, wear sunscreen, don't get any tattoos or piercings, and for the love of G-d, please don't post any pictures of yourself in a wet t-shirt contest on Facebook. Or be sucked in by the Girls Gone Wild urchins. Your future employer will find the evidence, I promise.

Former Texan Shelby Knox wrote a great piece for Huffington Post on Spring Break safety and she included several tips that wouldn't have occurred to me, including:
  • If it's mom you'd want the hospital to call when you've got heat exhaustion, program her numbers into your phone under ICE ("In Case of Emergency") before you set off.
  • As a rule, no one should leave alone with a new-found "friend" -- but if you absolutely must head out for a hook-up, have a friend program your prize's phone number in her phone and take a picture of you together. Set a time to check-in by text -- and make sure to follow through.
Thanks, Shelby.

Have a great time, y'all!

Wednesday, March 10, 2010


So our Miss Julie Sunday, just posted an amazing piece on pregnancy rates in Austin and Texas and the abysmal record of sex education throughout the state. She's right on all counts. Things are terrible.

I'm a parent of two children, both under high school age. I'm filled with trepidation as they approach puberty. Not because I have any fear of talking to them about their bodies, or dealing with the myriad emotions and issues that puberty brings, but because I know they are going to get shit tons of misinformation through the schools and through their peers.

In short, the attitude around kids and sexuality is completely god awful. And so where Miss Sunday will post facts? I will post a rant.

Case in point, when my oldest was first in kindergarten, I got a call from the principal's office. She let me know she was calling to discuss "an incident" that had occurred on the playground. The incident was a simple age appropriate moment between three kids, one of them mine, discussing their body parts and taking a quick peek.

I laughed the laugh of a woman raised in the 70's, quite familiar with "Doctor" and expected a chuckle on the other end of the phone. Surely, the call would end with a warm moment between adults, with the concluding remarks of something like, "I'll have a talk with him tonight." She didn't respond with a chuckle. "I have to mark it that I've reported it to you. If it happens again, it will have to be considered a sexual incident."

The what?

Kids talking about their body parts and having a look was a sexual incident? Even playing full on doctor is widely considered absolutely normal for kids of 5 years. The kids don't know what "sexual" means. They just know they have funny looking parts. The correct way to handle it is with calm and understanding, not shaming them and scaring the parents.

I figure that the administrators are terrified themselves. Scared of lawsuits, scared of bad press, scared of having to deal with the all too real incidents that are actually "incidents". There are zero tolerance policies for contact/touching/hugging all over the nation, Texas is no exception.

I think what it does though, instead of letting kids grow up with a normalized sense of how their bodies work and develop, is create an environment where their body is the enemy. Where their natural inclination for curiosity is suspect and where parents are faced with trying to promote healthy sexuality and healthy boundaries which may actually be considered far too liberal by the schools.

Then again, what is healthy? If you are reading this blog, I bet you are biased towards the open and communicative, towards the rights for LGBT individuals and towards a "no harm no foul" approach to sexuality. So am I. And I want my kids to grow up knowing their bodies are their own and that they need to respect their bodies as well as others. They can only do that if they have the room to learn in a safe and comprehensive way.

I fear that if Kindergarten in Texas was any indication, the teen years are gonna be a doozy.

Monday, March 8, 2010

Abstinence FAIL:
375 Girls Pregnant in Austin Schools

Teens in AISD have definitely still got it. Graph from the Onion.

In February I was invited to attend "Continued Conversation with Dr. Carstarphen: The State of Student Health in AISD," a meeting of school officials and community partners to tackle one of Superintendent Carstarphen's "Big, Hairy Audacious Goals"-- decreasing teen pregnancy. Pregnancy among teen girls, along with childhood obesity, is the biggest contributor to poor attendance and dropout rates among students in AISD.

Nearly 400 girls in AISD are receiving pregnancy case management services from Student Health Services*, which means that more girls could be pregnant and are choosing to have their pregnancy managed elsewhere or terminating their pregnancy before the district has time to count them as pregnant. The good news is that there are only 26 pregnant middle school girls; the bad news is that in the high schools, there are 349 girls who are currently pregnant, a 7.76% increase over the past year and a nearly 50% increase over the 2005-06 school year. The pregnancies are broken up by school as follows:
  • Akins: 140
  • Anderson: 10
  • Austin: 9
  • Bowie: 2
  • Crockett: 34
  • Eastside Memorial: 10
  • International: 3
  • LBJ: 12
  • Lanier: 10
  • McCallum: 16
  • Reagan: 40
  • Travis: 63
AISD's policy on sex education mirrors that of the state, which is to say it mostly prohibits any discussion of actual methods of preventing pregnancy and STIs. It explicitly prohibits the demonstration or distribution of contraceptive methods, including condoms, and it also prohibits outside agencies--from Planned Parenthood to Austin LifeGuard--from coming into the schools to do sex education programs. The only thing schools can do is make pamphlets about contraception available at the back of the classroom and hope they make it into the hands of students who need them. (Spoiler: they usually don't.)

The map below shows the schools with pregnancies this school year:

The verdict is in on abstinence education, and it doesn't work any better in Texas than it does anywhere else--but AISD's hands are tied by the state's policy despite the district's embarassingly high teen pregnancy rate**--31.06 per 1000 girls. That's higher even than Texas' state rate for girls of the same age, which is 25.9 per 1000 for 2005.

Furthermore, according to the same report issued at the AISD meeting, "an emerging Travis County community health issue related to teen pregnancy is the prevalence of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) among adolescents." The rates are:

  • Chlamydia: boys: 253.4/100,000; girls: 1826.4/100,000
  • Gonorrhea: boys: 109.1/100,000; girls: 435.2/100,000

The overall Texas rate for Chlamydia: 365/100,000; overall Travis County rate: 526/100,000. Ouch, AISD.

With the evidence of high teen pregnancy rates and sky-high Chlamydia/gonorrhea incidence, Austin has its work cut out for itself in trying to somehow find wiggle room in the archaic state policy to provide essential information to its students. Perhaps more prescient, considering AISD's ongoing budget crisis, is the fact that nearly 400 girls are getting case management services provided by the county at a cost that surely exceeds what it would cost to provide actual health information and condoms to students who are very clearly already having sex. I think it's time for AISD to make some changes. Let's hope Dr. Carstarphen has the will to get the job done.

*"Children's/AISD Student Health Services School Year 2009-2010 Report. PRS [pregnancy resource services] Services." Provided by AISD staff at the Conversation With Dr. Carstarphen--February 9th, 2010. Interestingly, there is no mention on the AISD website about these services.

**These data, which come from AISD's report, include only girls ages 13-17 which is why the rate is so much lower than the overall Texas rate of 88 pregnancies per 1000 girls ages 15-19.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Please Allow Me To Introduce Myself

Hi there, I'm Ms. Goose and I'll be a contributing writer here at How to Have Sex in Texas.

I'm over 40, bisexual with polyamorous leanings, quite kink friendly, a parent who is extremely interested in the abysmal state of sex education in our fair state, and a Texan by birth and by choice.

I was lucky enough to meet Miss Sunday about six months ago, and I knew when I saw the spark in her eyes, that she was solid gold. And she is. I'm glad to be working with her and I hope you'll enjoy my posts.

I'll be writing about comprehensive sex ed issues, alternative relationships styles, political issues pertaining to all of the above, as well as some general opinion pieces, all with a sharp focus on Texas, of course.

Until next time...

Thursday, March 4, 2010

UT System Elects First Woman Chair:
Better Warn Her About Hook-Up Culture

Memo to McHugh: College Girls Are Going WILD!

From the Statesman: the University of Texas System Board of Regents unanimously elected a woman, Colleen McHugh, to be its leader this week. This continues the terrifying trend in higher education of women dominating everything.

At the University of Texas, a staggering 51.5% of undergraduates are female. Texas A & M is keeping its 48% of female undergradutes in their place. Gig 'em! Texas Tech is leading the pack with a safe 44% female student body. Guns Up, indeed.

Everyone knows that when women outnumber men in an institution, the "price" of sex declines and "hooking up," or the practice of, ahem, watching the preview before committing to buy the DVD, becomes the primary way in which men and women relate to eachother. And the documentary video footage of the Girls Gone Wild franchise proves that college girls are not only going wild, they are veritably SEX STARVED! Look out!

Thankfully for McHugh, everyone from the Heritage Foundation to the Independent Women's Forum to your surrogate spinster aunt Laura Sessions Stepp is eager to protect young women by shouting that hooking up is a roll of the dice! What are your chances of perfect sixes every time?!? It's not clear what they think coeds want by way of a pair of "perfect sixes" (not a college education, apparently) but they are convinced girls aren't getting it.

For those women who have been taken in by the hookup culture, Dr. Miriam Grossman (formerly a physician at UCLA's student health center who has myseriously been relocated [read: fired] to the conservative chattersphere) is here to scold you and tell you that you better stop hooking up and start trying to get married, because your fertility is a window of opportunity that will close; the rectum is an exit, not an entrance; because of chemicals in the brain, when you hook up with a guy he's all you can think about (right?), he can't even remember your name; because you're drunk you can't tell how ugly the guy is anyway; and really, you should be saving it for marriage. By which she means trying to get married. Right now.

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Girls were Going Wild when I was in college 10 years ago (!) but I managed to come out alive. I wish Ms. McHugh the best of luck surviving the UT System with her dignity (and cervix) intact. Because these sex starved college coeds will stop at nothing to get what they want! Are you ready to give it to 'em?

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Four More Years of Guv'na GoodHair:
Time to Break the Abstinence Industrial Complex

This comes verbatim from Pam Stenzel's "Sex Still Has a Price Tag," used in Texas public schools

Now that Governor Goodhair has won the primary we in Texas can look forward to 4 more years of the same old funneling of state and federal money to abstinence pushers who are team players in the great conservative quest to punish women for having sex. If you haven't been paying attention to abstinence education in Texas for the past 10 or so years, now is a great time to start. Here's a to-do list:
Once you've done that, you'll be good and fired up to attend a training in April put on by the Texas Freedom Network, Planned Parenthood of North Texas, and a host of other partners that will teach attenders how to advocate for better sex education as allies for LGBTQ youth specifically.

Abstinence education is bad for everyone but it is especially harmful for LGBTQ youth who are, at best, entirely ignored by the programs and, at worst, taught religious extremist anti-gay views. In public schools. Since gay marriage is illegal in Texas (though not, apparently, gay divorce), programs that teach that sex is only acceptable in the context of marriage deliberately exclude anyone who isn't straight--or willing to pretend they're straight and, you know, be gay with a meth-head male hooker on the side.

Here's the training description:
Come learn how abstinence-only programs fail and ignore LGBTQ youth and what you can do to advocate effectively for responsible sex ed policies that help all young people. This training is for youth ages 15-24.
We will also provide specific training opportunities for adult allies and youth ministers.
Sounds good.

*# 4 in new AIDS cases; #15 in abortions; STD testing nor emergency contraception covered by Medicaid; #4 in teen pregnancy (for now); etc.

**like the military industrial complex, the abstinence education complex demonstrates the cozy relationships between political conservatives and faith-based "organizations" (read: businesses) that put together abstinence curricula and programs. the states that have received the most federal abstinence funding (Georgia, Texas, and Illinois) also happen to be the states with the biggest producers of program materials.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Battle in Amarillo:
The War on Straight's Rights

Seriously? Yup.

A blockbuster of a story came out last week in the Texas Observer about a radical Christian terrorist group, Repent Amarillo, that has successfully shut down a swinger's club and is on the warpath to do more damage to anyone not considered a member of God's "Special Forces."

The group's website looks an awful lot like and is clearly trying to hook in disaffected, bored young men who need something "manly" to do in their spare time. This sounds an awful lot like Taliban recruitment, to me, and their mission statement about being "warriors" couldn't be more clear:
Repent Amarillo is comprised of two groups blended together, working together, to compliment and support one another for the purpose of spiritual warfare. They are;

1. Intercessory prayer group...
2. The Soldier group. The soldier group will consist of warriors dedicated to witnessing to groups of unbelievers or one-on-one witnessing. This group will be more visible to the public and will be comprised of bold believers willing to confront the world. This group will be schooled in the “Way of the Master” method of witnessing to the lost. This group will be the ones who plant God’s seeds in the ground that has been prepared by the intercessory prayer group. Believers who participate in this group will have to be bold but loving. Confrontational but composed. The individual members of these two groups are allowed and highly encouraged to move between the two groups based on the individual’s calling and the unique mission involved. In other words, no one is stuck to only one group. Soldiers can pray and intercessory members can witness.
It was members of this "soldier" group that confronted, harassed, and smeared members of the Amarillo swinger's club, employing such apparently "Christian" tactics as posting names, employers, and license plate numbers of club attenders online, resulting in lost jobs and social ostracism--which, I guess, was the point--for several members.
The swinger's club has been shut down, but Repent Amarillo won't stop there--their website has a map featuring their local targets.

Repent Amarillo's "Prayer Map" of objectionable churches, parks, and businesses

Repent also gives a preview of the kinds of events they find objectionable and predict they will show up to and "witness":

1. Gay pride events.
2. Earth worship events such as “Earth Day”
3. Pro-abortion events or places such as Planned Parenthood
4. Breast cancer events such as “Race for the Cure” to illuminate the link between abortion and breast cancer.
5. Opening day of public schools to reach out to students.
6. Spring break events.
7. Demonically based concerts.
8. Halloween events.
9. Other events that may arise that the ministry feels called to confront.
1. Sexually oriented businesses such as pornography shops, strip joints, and XXX-rated theaters.
2. Idolatry locations such as palm readers, false religions, and witchcraft. Many of the smaller missions listed above may be just prayer oriented missions for tearing down demonic strongholds or they may involve more aggressive use of soldiers and prayer warriors.
That doesn't leave much to do in Amarillo except But not St. Andrew's Episcopal Church, which is described thusly on their "warfare map":
Referred to on OUTstanding Amarillo's ( Homosexual activists) website as a "gay friendly" church. In other words, they do not tell homosexuals who attend this church that they must repent of the sin of homosexuality. This a serious violation of scripture.
And not First Church of Christ, Scientist, the Unitarian Church, the First Church of Practical Christianity, the Metropolitan Community Church, or the Islamic Center of Amarillo. They don't even like the Masons.

Live in Texas? Want to stand up for your right to not be chased around by a bunch of Christian terrorists? Join the Facebook group. But don't try to go to the Route 66 Swinger's Club in Amarillo, because it's been shut down. Their website now carries the message below.

Monday, March 1, 2010

The Texas Primaries:
All Roads Lead to Douchetown

The Texas Primaries: Queerer than a... ROT $3 bill?

The Austin-American Statesman reported Sunday that both major Republican candidates for guv'na in Texas, epic asshat Rick Perry and "I am pro-life, I de-clayire!" Kay Bailey Hutchison, attended a fundraiser for the Prestonwood [crisis] Pregnancy Center in Dallas yesterday honoring the decade's finest Texas douchebag, George W. Bush.
According to an outline of his remarks provided before the benefit, Perry said, "I feel like I am in the garrison of an army that has devoted itself to the defense of the unborn."

His remarks also thanked Bush. "There is no way to tell how many lives were protected by your fearless pro-life efforts," Perry's speech said. that army also prepared to, I dunno, secede from the United States, Governor Perry? And equal time for Hutchison, who went to services yesterday at Lakewood with my secret church crush Joel Osteen:

Hutchison has voiced support for Roe v. Wade, but she has sought to find common ground with its opponents in other ways.

In a mailing she sent to some voters, Hutchison touted her high lifetime rating from National Right to Life and votes against federal funding of abortion and against the late-term procedure known as partial-birth abortion.

The primary is officially tomorrow (Texas Independence Day!) so it's your last chance to vote for KBH and ruin Perry's chances of further fucking up Texas.